Awkwardness

In my 31 years, I have never once been "picked up." J is incredulous, but it's true. Never has a guy bought me a drink at a bar or stopped me at a show or coffee shop and asked for my number. I've never actually been asked out on a date--I knew my college and law school exes as friends/acquaintances before I started dating them. And I wouldn't say that J picked me up because we were introduced by a mutual friend and we hung out in my kitchen (and at a burlesque show and at Popeye's Fried Chicken) before we started sucking face on the dance floor and he asked me for my email address.

So irony of ironies, the first time I get picked up is today, 1) after I'm already married and 2) at the "Queen" Soopers of all places. The worst part is that I didn't even realize it was happening while it was happening. I thought the guy standing behind me was just making conversation because we were stuck waiting in the checkout line for fifteen minutes and ended up having to get in another line because the cash register froze. But after I finally paid for my groceries and started to make my way through the parking lot, I heard the same guy call after me and ask if I wanted to continue the conversation later. And even then, I still didn't get what he meant, so I said, "Sure, why not?" Because I like making new friends.

It wasn't until he wanted to exchange Facebook information and said we should grab a drink at a bar that it started to dawn on me that he was asking me out. And then I felt terrible because I felt like I had led him on, which of course I didn't mean to. I told him I was married and apologized somewhat awkwardly for not having understood his meaning, but he was really embarrassed and said, "My friend told me I probably didn't have a chance with you." Oh, sad. He probably thinks that I just made up a fake husband to get out of the situation. Sigh.

I really need to not be so clueless but honestly, this has never happened to me before. I was kind of invisible in high school. During my freshmen year of college, I was close friends with three girls; a group of guys, who took it upon themselves to rate the freshmen, referred to me as "the plain one." So yeah, I don't really expect to be approached for dates. Time to get my engagement ring resized and start wearing it, I suppose.